Two suitors remain

Two guys are left on ABC’s The Bachelorette (finale on August 6).

There’s a good chance that Becca Kufrin will end up engaged to a guy with more isms than you’d think possible.

Becca, a women’s rights activist said of Garrett (one of the two men) that she’d educate him. This presumes she’s not just a friend, lover, fiancée but and educator.

You can’t change a man or can you? This is a worthy premise or trope for a romance novel. I remember Governor Wallace walking into a Black church and asking for forgiveness. It took him 30 years. With Garrett, I hope for Becca’s sake that it won’t take long. In our romance fiction, typical alpha males don’t sit for being educated by their women, none. I’m not sure if Garrett is alpha. He has been burnt in the past (a two-month marriage) and may seek direction. He wants this marriage to work and will likely try to change.

For those who don’t know: Garrett liked certain Instagram posts that made fun of Mexican children, women activists, LBGTQ people, and a post that said that the Parkland High schoolers who were marching for common-sense gun control were actors.

Nonetheless, you know me. I’m always hoping for a happy ending.

Also, in these days of rampant hatred, it is good to see a liberal woman reaching out. Can’t we all get along? Shouldn’t we all get along?

Why can't a woman be more like a man?

“Why can’t a woman be more like a man?” [Henry Higgins, My Fair Lady]

This is so culturally loaded that it shouldn’t be touched. But I will.

Before I start I want to differentiate between how men and women act in the workplace and their love, friends, social and family lives. In the work place, I have detected, being a long-time manager of many, no difference. For the rest of life’s adventures men and women act differently. This is possibly a mix of inborn and learned traits. It is also important to note that we are romance writers and must be shroud observers of how men and women fall in love.

Regarding non-workplace activities these are my observations once again: on average women seem more emotional. [Men hide their emotions better according to various studies.] Since emotions are more often the deciding factor as opposed to logic shouldn’t a man be more like a woman?

Let’s relate this to our craft.

1. Plotting in a logical manner may not lead to a human result, i.e. believable by your readers. This may create a boring lifeless story. Sure, plan, but get ready for your characters to interrupt you with ideas of their own. Remember a character doesn’t come to life if it ain’t alive. [Check out Plato and his philosophy about a world of forms. He stated that every thought has existence.]

2. No protagonist is perfect, right? If yours is, interview him deeper or start writing comic books.

3. There’s nothing worse than writing the predictable, trope laden, clichéd story.

Thank God, women and men are different. I think.

Grandpopasaurus

I got out of the shower, dressed but didn’t comb my hair. A scary sight. I Facetimed my 10-year-old grandson who is visiting New York City. I introduced myself as a Grandpopasaurs and immediately intrigued him. I asked him what his favorite dinosaur at the natural history museum was. "Ankylaurus." "Why?" Kai said, “he has all these things coming out of his head (like you).” I asked him if the dinosaurs were running all over the place like in the movie? "No," but in his mind, they were tearing up the place and some were eating tourists.

It dawned on me that we should be doing that* up front in our novels. *Intriguing, turning on the reader’s imagination, fantasies. This transports them to your world. Books on writing all talk about developing empathy in the first chapter. I say don’t forget intriguing your reader as well.

This type of writing happens all the time in song. Lyricists must capture us during a 2 or 3-minute song.

Here's an example from song:
Shut Up and Dance, by Walk the Moon, 2014

I say, “this (newly met) woman is my destiny.”

She says, “shut up and dance with me.” Wow, you can read into this statement that she wants to dance, is attracted, doesn’t want him to put the horse before the cart, see where this leads naturally (in an earthy situation, etc. etc,). 

Two examples from novels:
Example 1 is from Neanderthals and the Garden of Eden, by RW Richard, 2006

EVENTS CONCERNING AND ON THE MORNING OF MAY 27 1942 PRAGUE.

Doctor Siegbert Singer, chief archeologist for the Reich and SS group leader used every advantage he could to stay alive in a world built on paranoia and literal backstabbing. The Nazis found his initials, SS, a sign of destiny. It helped his longevity. Therefore, he didn’t need encouragement when he pushed his only friend and fellow SS officer off the sheer southern cliff of Twin Summits Mountain. …“you should try skiing today, Max. Auf Wiedersehen.” 

Example 2 is from Natural Born Charmer, by Susan Elizabeth Phillips, 2007]

It wasn’t every day a guy saw a headless beaver marching down the side of the road, not even in Dean Robillard’s larger-than-life world. “Son of a…” Dean slammed the brakes of his brand-new Aston Martin Vanquish and pulled over in front of her. 

I’d love to hear your intriguing, engaging hook.

Shut Up and Dance
https://www2.bing.com/videos/search?q=walk+the+moon+shut+up+and+dance&docid=608035679248908561&mid=28FE4AFDA99DDB2AABB628FE4AFDA99DDB2AABB6&view=detail&FORM=VIRE
https://www2.bing.com/videos/search?q=walk+the+moon+shut+up+and+dance&docid=608035679248908561&mid=28FE4AFDA99DDB2AABB628FE4AFDA99DDB2AABB6&view=detail&FORM=VIRE

Meet me in the middle

The Middle by Zedd, Morris, & Grey is a 2018 log running number one hit.
Lovers meeting in the middle or not over some issues. They have disagreements. They're in. They're out. It's a mess. She wants him to pull her closer, come on over.

This is drama and good for romance fiction. But don't forget the end game. This is where the lovers run past half way. They reach the finish line. They have both given 100% to each other. There is perfect balance. It's not the middle. It's all in.
Their love doesn't consume each other. It makes their lives complete. Man fulfills himself, carries on the Creator's purpose by finding his mate (and adoring her). I do.

The Middle 2018 by Zedd, Morris, Grey
https://youtu.be/M3mJkSqZbX4

I think the world of you

I think the world of you.

A cliché to be sure. It is almost a throw away line like have a good day. Clichés are there for a reason. They generally use less words and are the most precise way of expressing something. So, if the person is being genuine (and not a fiction writer) what does it mean?

To suggest that someone means the world to you is a variation on “you are my world.” These two phrases are close enough in meaning to be grouped here. Humans search for purpose. If their purpose is making another human being happy, these clichés apply. In this purpose a person finds meaning for hi life. He is fulfilled. He can die someday with the thought of great peace and accomplishment.

Writing “I think the world of you” or some creative substitution should be accompanied by body language, internal monologue, etc. Since clarity is king and clichés are overused to the state of being watered down the writer must clarify. A creative substitution should also be clarified to enrich the story and because a little used phrase is also little understood.

Try “without you I am lost” or “I eat, drink and sleep you.” Have fun with your substitutions.