I can't make you love me, if you don't

Black moments in rewriting

I’ve been farming out my four yet unpublished novels to freelance editors. On one of the stories the editor wrote back suggesting the proper placement of black moments, the development of story arcs (in this case more intermingling of some of the main characters) and the need for more backstory here and there. This editor also loved the story and wrote using these terms: gripping/dramatic/gritty/emotionally-wrenching tone/distinctive and compelling narrative voice/brisk pace/multi-faceted protagonists, colorful cast of secondary characters, complex villians. She edits for Harlequin which follows formulas. I use Christopher Vogler’s The Writer’s Journey or Story by Robert McKee (as prime examples). In short, this particular novel (romantic elements) follows a general fiction path unsuitable for Harlequin. But she also makes a point about how I can improve it.

Basically, I prefer gray moments rather than black moments if I think the interior journey of my heroine/hero has hit bottom. I will change some of this manuscript because her input was valuable.

In defense of gray moments, Jill Shalvis admits to preferring gray moments. Other best selling authors have said the same thing. I like the idea of taking a different and unexpected path, with all due care to not bore the reader. The main problem with romances is the ending is known, it's also its strength, but that doesn’t mean you can’t take a different (and refreshing) bumpy road. In romance the guy gets the gal, in a mystery the puzzle is solved, in a thriller the bad guys are thwarted.

 

In short, and for this novel, I can say to Harlequin, “I can’t make you love me, if you don’t.” This novel (AUTUMN BREEZE) will be indie published. Next week I’m going to attempt to compare indie-publishing to indie-records.

 

I Can't Make You Love Me, Bonnie Raitt, 2010.

 

This song is not about my editor, who is on my team, but about Harlequin. A company, I fear I'll never write for. It's time to move on and find a new lover.

 
BTW, if I made all the changes my editor suggested, I'd be at 120,000 words! Harlequin would say no because it wouldn't fit their word count guidelines.

A PEARL OF GREAT VALUE

When I look into your eyes

In the parable as in real life, taking a leap of faith, giving up everything to possess the pearl of great value has its award. Heaven (the pearl), in the case of the parable and heaven on earth for The Bachelorette. Andi Dorfman gave up her job (not career) as an assistant district attorney for Atlanta to find that one greatest gift the creator has allowed us on this Earth, love. Her pearl of great value is that man who would complement her on life’s journey. BTW, along the way, he'll compliment her.

For the men, she is that pearl, their heaven on earth. On this season of The Bachelorette, more men than ever before have declared their love for this woman. Why? Throw out the stereotype that in a man’s eyes a woman must be barefoot (allegory for dumb). Andy is impressive, not only in beauty and heart, easily demonstrated by the caring way she treated her suitors, but in intellect, not so easily demonstrated. (She's a terrible dancer but that wouldn't have stopped a bachelor me.)

I had been particularly impressed when she visited Nick’s (one of the two final men) family. Nick has eleven brothers and sisters including him. She’s sitting in the living room surrounded by multiple pictures of the extended family and some at various ages. Someone, in gest, asked her if she could attach a name to each picture. She reeled them off without hesitation. This is a sign of a well-organized and trained mind. It’s also a sign of a woman who is passionate about getting to know Nick’s family. Applying intense desire produces better results (yo, in writing too).

I know some of my blog followers are skeptical of this show for various reasons. This season, however, included a lie detector test. Surprise. And why not every season? Andy’s test was read on the air. Yes, she was on the show for the right reasons, not necessarily a given. Some of the men lied and may not have been on the show for the right reasons. We don’t know at this point, because, Andy, an attorney, decided to rip the reports up and place her trust in her suitors. What? What? Her whole love life depends on picking the right guy. Perhaps she had already decided.

Okay, one of the two remaining bachelors (Josh) lied when he took the lie-detector test. Perhaps his lies were innocuous or perhaps he grew into his love for Andy.

Monday night, July 28, 2014 is the finale and its fans and perhaps some sceptics will check it out.

Are you expecting a Bachelorette promo below? Not this time. You'll just have to tune in tomorrow night to see Andy and her two suitors.

Firehouse's WHEN I LOOK INTO YOUR EYES, 1992

 

Dating Naked



I purposefully avoided this show, but that doesn't mean I'm not still curious. A writer is a student of human nature, right? On Thursday, July 17th, we watched ABC Family's P.s. I Love You instead, which I thought would be better for me as a writer and more entertaining. I wasn't let down.

 

The best writing is your truest writing. You censor if you think it helps the plot or story. I admire anyone who can write in a genre without pulling their punches. This includes sweet or inspirational stories which can cover some of the grittiest problems. Uplifting finishes are part of what makes a happily-ever-after.

 

I'm not suggesting you write naked or suggest your critique group meet naked. Write the naked truth that fits your story.

 

From a my guy's point of view, dating naked is not necessary, since I already know exactly what I like in face, figu, personality and heart.

 

Here's ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT'S take on the show:

 

If your curiosity has gotten the best of you, it's easy these days to see a show you missed by using On Demand, the internet, etc.

AUTHORS ANONYMOUS



Are most writers anonymous? If you reach one person's heart uplifting her spirit or supplying an insight, you've done your job. This bonding is like having a tea or coffee with the reader, in which the two of you share joy and sorrow. In the case of romance writers, they find beautiful ways to state the point of life, love. Of course, it's better to have reached 10, or 100, or 1000 or 10,000 hearts, but our drive to contribute is also very human. Trying to improve the human condition in any manner is also the greatest sign of love.

 

AUTHORS ANONYMOUS, 2014, is a movie about members of a critique group. Non-writers give it 1 or 2 stars, saying it has no drama, (nothing they recognize as drama). Writers who critique the movie give it 4 or 5 stars. I've never seen this drastic a dichotomy before. You just have to like over=the-top satire, allegory and lampooning to like this movie. There is however a kernel of truth that will make you  (the writer) smile. Perhaps you'll see a little of yourself, God forbid, or someone else in your group (just a little and just once in a while). We have lived the strange world of critique groups.

 

The AUTHORS ANONYMOUS trailer:

 

A guy's intuition

I had been sent into Target to buy two things. The store is huge, so I looked around for someone official to ask directions. No one appeared. I decided to turn on my intuition. Cleared all my thoughts and let my feet take me to the two objects. Job done. (Naturally having a huge amount of training in logic, deduction and induction helped, subconsciously and consciously).


I'm in an aerobics class with a dear friend on my side. Girls (the entire class was mostly strangers except for the bond to class) she never talked to (as far as I know) started offering her support. She had barely whispered to me that her boyfriend had broken up with her a couple days before  and that she had cried. The girls' radar picked up on what is a very feminine way of dealing with loss but was hardly demonstrated in class. I needed to be informed. They emoted. I knew months previous to this I knew that something was amiss. I don't know what the group knew.


What's the meaning of all this? Well, remember, I might not represent the typical male and this blog is primarily about exceptions to rules. I consider myself the creative type. Also the sample of odd occurrences is not large enough to discover a truth. Perhaps you have stories that you'd like to share.


There are intertwined fields of studies about seeing the world beyond science as we know it today. There's super string theory with its ten dimensions, noetic science, telepathy, remote viewing, etc. I'm a sceptic with an open mind. But intuition is simple, right?
Here we have Tim Cook's (Apple CEO) take on intuition:

WHEN SPARKS FLY

Last night, Saturday, we watched a Hallmark premier, WHEN SPARKS FLY. For those interested, it’s on again tonight at 9. Hallmark is often our date. The premise of this one bothered me initially because it seemed to undermine the value of and honor in friendship. A bride-to-be asks her best friend (bff) to be maid of honor at her wedding to her best friend’s ex-boyfriend. I being a male writer of romance was skeptical the writers and actors could pull off a happily-ever-after when some old feelings (7 years old) are stirred up). I’m not going to give away the ending, but my hat is off to the superb acting of both heroines.

I realized or remembered two things:

1.      If I ever meet my high school sweetheart somehow, there would be little doubt feelings would surge through me as I recalled all our great times.

2.      I too am very guilty of using this plot twist in Double Happiness (soon to be released). So basically I shut up, sat down and with an open mind, watched.

Afterwards, my wife innocently said, this is like so many of the romance novels she reads (does she not know I write and understand romance or do I really understand the finer points of romance). I struggle.

The relationship between the two girls is a joy to watch, especially in the final act of the movie.

 

Here's hallmark's promo:

 

AGENT SIX AND THREE QUARTERS

Men can't help compare themselves to other men. It's like a ridiculous and usually subconscious monkey on your back that you try to ignore.

The following is dedicated to a dear friend and former CIA agent who passed away.

Agent Six and Three Quarters

They gave me that name because I couldn’t measure up to James Bond. Nobody can really. Fictional characters are fictional for a reason. The nickname was born of affection not derision, anyway. Apparently, I’m considered better than agent Six and a Half. As for my shortcomings—well don’t we all have them—six and three quarters is a good measure for just about anything.

I am very much real. I’ve met the enemy, none of them measure up, because they live in an upside down world in which good is evil and evil is good. The downtrodden people they claim to help, they hurt.

The fictional Bond had a glaring defect, but violence sells movie tickets. The real work is much harder and to some not as exciting. You’ll never see my exploits on the silver screen, well maybe a BBC or PBS effort. Bond has no feelings for the people he kills. It’s unlikely you’d get a job here at the CIA if you didn’t try to get to the bottom of a problem. Analyze strengths and weaknesses; turn your enemy into an ally. The CIA recruits renaissance men and women, who might not do too badly on Jeopardy.

When you negotiate you have a chance at solving greater problems. Notice the word negotiate? Here I shout. I’m not going to stop here and go on about the stubborn idiots in congress. You all know how I feel.

Calming down now. Back to the Middle East: Some religious radicals, distort their faith with misguided notions. We were all born into a set of beliefs given to us by hopefully loving parents. Generally we don’t question them, much. Neither does your average terrorist. It’s the beliefs endowed by our creator which any candidate for human being need find in life’s journey.

Yes, I have a license to kill, but isn’t it better to use a license to think. I always found a better way because I am agent Six and Three Quarters.

 

Then again, there aren't too many movies in which negotiation and nothing else wins the day. Enjoy a retrospective of fifty years of Bond.