A Pearl of Great Value

A Pearl of Great Value
Alternate title: Take out the trash
Is it only fantasy to have the hero decide to change his life and dedicate himself to the heroine? No, it happens, perhaps not too frequently.
How does it happen? Start with the hero wanting to make her happy always and in all ways, because he’s crazy about her and top over teakettle in love. To do this, he needs room or time in his life. So he must take out the trash. Trash, in this instance, are those minimal, useless or harmful habits that eat up time. Suppose the hero is into video gaming to a fault.
We know of many married men who don’t like suggestions from their spouses about what to do around the house. But, for the hero of our story he relishes the opportunity to please her. He’d rather literally take out the trash than play Counter-Strike.
It’s not just about chores.
The hero can learn about her likes and try to like them too.
He’ll then learn to share her joy.
The hero might even learn to have fruitful conversations.
He might even watch a Hallmark with her, etc.
He’ll look for every opportunity to make her feel loved.
In the parable of A Pearl of Great Value (likened to Heaven) the person finding the pearl sells everything he owns to possess it. For us men a woman is the closest we’ll get to heaven on Earth.

All or Nothing at All, 2104, Switchfoot.
https://youtu.be/_PrSVusfnWo

Love

Love

Their arms rapped around each other, their bodies a perfect fit, her head on his chest. He wondered why he was so lucky. He peered down to see her eyes looking into his. A little out of focus, maybe dreamy. She was content if this was the right word. Did she love him? She had never said so.
He had first seen her in a crowd of hundreds,  maybe fifteen years before and was struck by her pull on his body, mind, spirit. Never before had he felt such a momentous tug. But he couldn’t get to her that day. The only thought he remembered, and it was as if someone was whispering to him, “someday she will be your wife.” He didn’t know her name, never saw her again until five years ago when they met at a local Brooklyn coffee house.
They developed an easy friendship. He marveled at the way she acted. Zany, sweet, challenging, laughing at his lame jokes, big eyed enthusiasm for life and for him. But friends they remained until today.
He was certain she felt the same tug on her soul, that she loved him as much as he did her. Today, he had decided, would be the day he’d find a way to get to the truth without disturbing their friendship. He decided to hug her a bit more intimately and longer than ever before.
So far she liked it. He took a chance and kissed her forehead. No pull back. Yes. Now all he needed was the courage to say it, but she interrupted him. With the same dreamy eyed look on her lovely face, she said in a completely relaxed voice, and you got to know this girl doesn’t relax much. She said, “so this is love.”

Til Then, the Mills Brothers, 1944
https://youtu.be/gPdidRreduM
https://youtu.be/gPdidRreduM

Isn't it a lovely day?

My younger of two daughters will soon marry. I'm a bit more mature than when I married, I notice the subtle fabric of these ceremonies and preparations. When I married, I focused on the minutia, I worried about costs, I helped plan the honeymoon, thought about my daughters someday to be and I said I do.

Now, I think of the complicated culture of marriage, the meaning of life commitment, of gaining new family and a new son. I don’t dwell on the doling out of money to fuel dreams of what people expect a marriage to be. I'm celebrating one of life's great moments. I revel in the process and find human life to be richer for it.

Many guys don’t see the need for all this or don’t quite recognize how special it is to the bride. But if his love is mature enough, he’ll be taking his first steps to understanding and appreciating that soul reaching out to him.
 

The Hallmark movie last night featured a young groom who would have preferred to show up in jeans and eat a cake shaped like a football. Although it was a bit of a caricature, the point was well taken. Guys focus on the result, gals on the process. You can’t have one without the other and the renaissance man revels in it. My about to be son-in-law is such a man.

A marriage is like two people who start a dance through the hard and easy of life and never take their eyes off each other.
Isn't It a Lovely Day, written by Irving Berlin, sung by Fred Astaire and danced with his partner Ginger Rogers, from the movie Top Hat 1935.

If you have a favorite wedding song, let me know and I'll blog it.

Dolorah offered Unchained Melody, Endless Love and I will Always Love You:
I'll pick Unchained Melody, originally written in 1936 offered to Bing Crosby who refused it. It sat for twenty years. Many consider it's best version was rendered by the Righteous Brothers in 1965:

 

Some men aren't ready for love, May 19, 2013

Some men are just not ready for a long term commitment. You could wait twenty years for this type of guy. Move on girls.

 

In honor of the Bachelorette which will start in a week. I thought we'd warm up.

 

Source: Baby Bachelor - Part 1 - You Tube